The Potatoes Versus the Toilet
by manyissues101
Summary: -part of 'Motherhood'- “Are you sure we should be doing this?” Kairi asked, looking down at the bowl. “Where else would we hide them? Besides, if we ate them then they’d just end up back here anyway,” Sora tried to reason.


"Are you sure we should be doing this

"Are you sure we should be doing this?" Kairi asked, looking down at the bowl.

"Where else would we hide them? Besides, if we ate them then they'd just end up back here anyway," Sora tried to reason.

Riku sat the pot down on the floor and knelt next to it. On top of it were three plates that held mashed potatoes of a strange yellow hue. He was about to begin the operation but Kairi interrupted.

"But won't Miss Kaito get upset? She worked really hard!"

"What she doesn't know," Riku said, picking up and plate and spoon, "can't hurt her."

Sora followed suit, grabbing a plate, spoon, and a place in front of the toilet. Kairi, with a little hesitation, soon complied. Quickly they scraped the plates into the toilet, each dollop of wannabe potatoes falling into the water with a sordid plop. Kairi wrinkled her nose while the boys just worked faster. They didn't have much time, and any leftovers they would be made to eat later.

Besides, it wasn't like it was the first time something like this had happened.

0--0

It was almost a tradition. Miss Lilly made wonderful food, being incredibly gifted in the arts of culinary, and the trio normally wolfed it down. Miss Mie had never been much for cooking, but her husband held the best barbecues around, and no one would ever turn down his grilled shrimp. Miss Kaito, bless her, wanted to feed them too, and so she asked Lilly for recipes. Then Kaito would spend the whole day practicing it until it was time for dinner, when she'd call the three teens in to try her new dish.

There hadn't been a single good one in the six or so years that she made them. Of course the kids didn't have the heart to tell her, because she was so good to them and it really pleased her when she saw them smiling. And so, because Kairi loved her too much, Sora couldn't stand to see anyone upset, and Riku wasn't going to disappoint his mother, Kaito had yet to realize that her dishes were borderline inedible.

This week it was mashed potatoes. They thought that, maybe, when they came back she'd forgotten all about making things for them. But their hopes were in vain, for Kaito had announced that they'd eat at her place that night, and that she'd worked on this entrée for quite a while. Exchanging worried glances, the three heroes just nodded along.

For years they'd find places to hide the food. On the off chance that they couldn't get rid of it all, Riku would make sure that it disappeared late into the night or early the next morning, claiming that he'd gotten hungry. It was their little secret, carefully hidden from Kaito because no one wanted to see her beaming smile fade.

She'd gone out, giving them just enough time to find a hiding place for the 'food'. Even Wafer, Miss Kaito's ancient cat, wouldn't come near it. They considered burying it, but quickly dismissed that notion when Kairi thought she saw it move. The last thing they wanted was for it to dig itself back out. Preposterous, sure, but so were black ants that tried to eat your heart.

That's when Riku suggested it. They were crowded around the bathroom sink, wondering if heaps of potatoes would clog it and give them away. But Riku's eyes slipped over and he said, "Why don't we flush them?"

0--0

They were shoveling the rations into the commode now, scraping the last little bites out, and quickly flushed a few times as to make sure that all the evidence disappeared. When they were satisfied they quickly made a beeline down the hallway into the kitchen, where they washed the plates like nothing had happened. Miss Kaito came through the front door then and asked them if they'd enjoyed their dinner. All three nodded, smiles on their faces.

"Good," Kaito smiled. "Did you guys eat it all? That's good! I just took some over to Mie and Lilly, so you two," she nodded and Kairi and Sora, "can have some tomorrow. I don't have anymore for you though, Riku. Is that okay?"

"That's fine, Mom," he replied, trying his hardest not to burst into laughter and his friends' downfallen expressions.

"Good. So where are you three heading now?"

"Um…probably to my place," Kairi spoke up. "I've, uh, I've got to clean out the refrigerator. There's some stuff in there that I don't even want to look at anymore. And these two are going to help me!" She looped arms with Riku and Sora. "Thanks for the food!"

"No problem, darlings."

As soon as they made it out the door, Riku chuckled. He looked between his two friends. "I'm definitely staying at my place tonight."

The other two grumbled, off to test modern manufacturing.

How much of Kaito's mashed potatoes could one toilet hold?

The world may never know.

0FIN0

Yeah…this is kind of random. It all started when my father, handing me a pot of day old mashed potatoes, told me to go dump them in the toilet. Apparently he forgot all about the eleven canines outside that would have been happy with them. See, these potatoes were actually good.

Set in my Motherhood universe, using the mothers I've created for the characters.

And the cat, Wafer, is named after the best puppy (yes, as in dog) in the whole world! She would have eaten the potatoes.


End file.
